I Confess: Does That Make Me A Bad Mom?

Let me start off by telling you what my mom told me…

Next to God, I love you more than anything in this world.

mom and son

But here is the deal…..

When you struggled with speech, I prayed for you to talk.

God answered my prayers! But most of the time I have no idea what you are talking about.

I get it though.

You love monsters, dinosaurs, aliens, and all things considered weird. I listen to be supportive and show you that I love you.

But I’m dying to get back to Netflix.

You are a picky eater. You love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Simple right?

I used to love peanut butter. But after years of making several of them each day, I now hate the smell of peanut butter!

pb and j.jpg

I was supposed to hold you responsible for completing your school project.

I did most of it.

Not because you couldn’t….I just enjoyed doing it myself. I haven’t painted in years! That was cool!

I love it when you play with your Legos. You work on those for hours. It builds your creativity, sharpens your work ethic, and gives you a sense of accomplishment!

…It also gives me time to watch more Netflix.

Did you notice how I didn’t encourage you to finish drinking your fresh-squeezed orange juice today at the restaurant? It’s because I wanted to drink it.

And I did……It was delicious.

Sometimes your Dad and I send you to the bathroom to “sit down and try to go” in the middle of a movie. We do this because we suspect an adult scene is coming on and we would prefer you to just leave the room rather than turn to something more kid friendly.

mommy guiltEvery weekend I ask if you want to go out and have fun. This is just my way of trying to be a good mom.  I’m actually relieved when you say you want to stay in for the day.

No, I don’t want to learn how to play Minecraft.

Yes, that song has cursing in it. I was hoping you were not paying attention.

The truth is, I do love you more than life itself.

I just suffer from Mommy guilt every now and then.

Today was one of those days.

And……as I write this…..you just came down stairs and asked for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

So, I’ll stop here.

But, before I go, stop asking me to take my phone off the charger so that you can charge my IPad and watch more videos!!

There, I said it!

Does that make me a bad mom?


Dr. Lauren Meeks  (Mommy)

Confessions Of A Melanated Queen

Confessions of A Melanated Queen: Complexities of the Modern Black Woman, is comprised of controversial and thought-provoking commentary related to life, marriage, and family, through the lens of a millennial African American woman



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