Let me start off by telling you what my mom told me…
Next to God, I love you more than anything in this world.
But here is the deal…..
When you struggled with speech, I prayed for you to talk.
God answered my prayers! But most of the time I have no idea what you are talking about.
I get it though.
You love monsters, dinosaurs, aliens, and all things considered weird. I listen to be supportive and show you that I love you.
But I’m dying to get back to Netflix.
You are a picky eater. You love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
I used to love peanut butter. But after years of making several of them each day, I now hate the smell of peanut butter!
I was supposed to hold you responsible for completing your school project.
I did most of it.
Not because you couldn’t….I just enjoyed doing it myself. I haven’t painted in years! That was cool!
I love it when you play with your Legos. You work on those for hours. It builds your creativity, sharpens your work ethic, and gives you a sense of accomplishment!
…It also gives me time to watch more Netflix.
Did you notice how I didn’t encourage you to finish drinking your fresh-squeezed orange juice today at the restaurant? It’s because I wanted to drink it.
And I did……It was delicious.
Sometimes your Dad and I send you to the bathroom to “sit down and try to go” in the middle of a movie. We do this because we suspect an adult scene is coming on and we would prefer you to just leave the room rather than turn to something more kid friendly.
Every weekend I ask if you want to go out and have fun. This is just my way of trying to be a good mom. I’m actually relieved when you say you want to stay in for the day.
No, I don’t want to learn how to play Minecraft.
Yes, that song has cursing in it. I was hoping you were not paying attention.
The truth is, I do love you more than life itself.
I just suffer from Mommy guilt every now and then.
Today was one of those days.
And……as I write this…..you just came down stairs and asked for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
So, I’ll stop here.
But, before I go, stop asking me to take my phone off the charger so that you can charge my IPad and watch more videos!!
There, I said it!
Does that make me a bad mom?
Dr. Lauren Meeks (Mommy)
Confessions Of A Melanated Queen
Confessions of A Melanated Queen: Complexities of the Modern Black Woman, is comprised of controversial and thought-provoking commentary related to life, marriage, and family, through the lens of a millennial African American woman